My heart...Mary's heart...the heart of those who saw

"On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. " Matthew 2:11

I was in Lifeway shopping for Christmas and on a sign they had up to advertise a new book, the above scripture was written. I read it and had to stop a minute. Something about it grabbed me. I know I have read this scripture a dozen or so times, but for some reason, it grabbed me this time. I'm not sure why. Maybe it was the picture I had in my head. Where Mary should have been, it was me, where there should have been the baby Jesus, it was my little Liam. How would I have reacted? Becoming a mother is about as overwhelming an experience as any woman can have. The simple act of the child leaving your body where you have felt, treasured every movement for the last 9 months and feel it no longer. The emptiness is immediate. You just KNOW they are no longer there. Then they are in your arms. You are looking at this little life and thinking is THIS mine? Did Mary think that? Did she think is HE mine?! Did she immediately feel protective of this child? That she would walk through fire for him RIGHT then? Did she want to curl up with him in her arms and stare at him for hours? What was her heart doing? Did it lurch like mine did? Was it so overcome with this unexplainable love that it overwhelmed her? These normal feelings that only a mother can understand and then these strangers come in and fall to their knees and worship this sweet little bundle of joy! What did Mary feel at that moment? The vanity in me would probably think "yes, SEE didn't I DO GOOD?!" Did Mary understand the monstrosity of the moment? Or was she just overwhelmed? Did she wonder what these people were thinking? Did she wonder why they were here? Or, did she know. What was in Mary's heart?

I know what was in my heart when I saw all three of my sons and I knew what dreams I had for them the moment they were placed in my arms. I knew what I wanted for them and what I wanted to protect them from. I knew what I wanted others to think of them and I knew how to love them. I KNEW....and I didn't give birth to the Savior....did Mary KNOW?!