A tradition of giving...

Today we celebrated Britton's birthday. We had his birthday party at the local bounce place. About 18 of his closest friends came and celebrated with us. It was a ton of fun. Today, however, it was not only fun, but just felt right...In our family, Josh and I feel like the art of gift giving isn't just about the gimme gimme gimme's...it's about someone who cares about you picking out a gift that they feel represents you or their friendship with you. Then the beauty of giving that special gift to you and being able to look you in the face as you marvel while opening it. In order to teach this lesson, when one of our boys are invited to a party, we take the boys to the store and let them pick out a gift for their friend. And when one of our boys is the recipient, we have each child who has brought a gift to one of our boys, we have that child hand the gift, one at a time to him. Sounds confusing...a wee bit crazy...and yes it takes more time...but the rewards are priceless!

At Aidan's last birthday, I asked each child, who brought a present to get their present and give it to Aidan...we did this one at a time...then Aidan was able to sit with his friend and open the gift they chose for him. With Aidan, because of his age, the child watched Aidan open his gift and then moved over and let the next person go...but this time, with Brit it was a little different. Because our "gift giving/receiving" tradition is so different, I always have to explain it. But not once have I heard anyone complain. Why would they...who doesn't want to GIVE and hand a gift to their friend and see the excitement on their face as they open it?! Sometimes the giving is the BEST part!! Especially if you have picked the gift that you feel is the perfect gift! After I explain our tradition, the kids run to get their presents and are constantly asking if they can go next. This year, as I said, I explained our tradition, let the kiddos get their gifts and then called them up one by one to hand their specially chosen gift to Britton. As Britton opened the gift, I took a picture of them together. I usually send the picture with the Thank You card. As I said, in years past, as with Aidan, it usually goes fairly fast. However, this year it was different. Maybe because they're older but things were definitely different. Britton's friends sat with him, some for several minutes as he opened their gift. They visited, giggled, the friends shared WHY they chose that gift and some even explained how cool it was because it.... It was touching to see. At one point, one of Brit's friends explained how she had made his card just for him...she had worked hard and it was evident. Britton looked at the card and said, "wow, Celesse, that's precious." During one moment, I moved closer to Brit's chair to hurry him and his little friend along, when I saw them huddled over the book that Brit had just been given, discussing how cool it was...I took a step back and paused...I thought, why rush him. This is why we chose to do things this way...so that Britton understands that the truest gift is one given of the heart. It doesn't matter how much it is, or how fancy or big it is...just that the person thought enough of him to give him a gift. A gift that they chose for him.

I am so proud of my little 7 year old man...today, on his 7th birthday...he got it..he understood the joy of receiving and giving a gift. Some may think it's a silly tradition, and yes, it definitely takes twice as long, but for my family...we will continue this tradition as long as my boys are under my roof...and I look forward to the day when they pass it onto their children. What is more fun than receiving a gift but GIVING one?!!

Time

In four days my oldest child will turn 7. I remember so clearly the feeling of pure joy I felt when I first saw him. I have been thinking all week of the first time I saw him and the moments after. I remember my mom gasping in joy and saying, "Oh Misty" when she saw him exit my body and enter into this world. I remember how he refused to cry and how when they kept putting oxygen on him he would bat it away. He didn't need oxygen, silly nurses! I remember that he finally did cry as they gave him his bath and man did he cry! I remember it all. I found some pictures recently of Brit around 6 months of age, the same age as Liam. I sat in the floor and stared at them and thought where has the TIME gone? Yes, I know, he is ONLY 7..but it has went too fast. Let me tell you my thought process here...

My brother, who is now 23, was seven when I got married. I remember so vividly the little boy he was. Now, in four short months he will be getting married himself. Where has the time gone? He is a grown man now and ready to start a life of his own, like I did some 15 years ago. I know some of the time passed while I was in college and working. But pass it did...Now, here we are...my oldest son is 7, the same age my brother was when I got married and all I can think is I'm not ready for it to pass quite as quickly this time. I don't have any regrets with my brother because as much as I love him, he is not mine. But this time... I want to enjoy every moment....breathe in every second....and live every minute with my son. I don't want to be standing in a church with Britton ready to watch him marry his bride and say where did the time go? I do not want any regrets. I want to cherish it all. Every single bit of it! Even the times when we disagree or he makes poor choices....all of it. Because Britton is mine.

So here's to the next 15 years with my eldest son...I know without a doubt he will do great things..I am so proud to be his momma...so my prayer is God if you see me NOT enjoying every moment with him...give me a jolt...wake me up...shake me..remind me...how quick the time goes.

Our Song

With both Aidan and Britton, I had found a special song that represented our "first year" together. Brit's was "I don't wanna miss a thing" & Aidan's was "In My Arms". I have been trying so hard to come up with a song that is Liam and I. He is now six months old and time seems to be flying by. In no time at all I will need to put my video together of our first year with Liam. I heard a song the other day, have heard it a million times but for some reason it struck a chord with me. It is "Smile" by Uncle Kracker. The song is written by a man about the woman he is in love with..but as I listened I realized in a funny way, it described the relationship Liam and I have and the love that he brings to this family. I haven't decided for sure yet, but I have a feeling this will be "our song"...

I know it's silly, but when I think of my boys and "Our Song(s)" I have a million different images in my mind. One is so clear and special it gives me pause. It is a picture of me dancing with my boys, at their weddings, with "Our Song" playing...our last dance before he forever looks at his bride the way he looks at me right now.

What a 7 Year Old Taught Me

On Saturday Britton did a fundraiser for an all accessible playground. He heard the story of Melaina, a sweet little girl was a vibrant and spunky 3-year- old who didn’t let a disease like Nemaline Myopathy diminish her spirit. Even though she had some physical limitations, she still wanted the adventure that comes to a child through a playground. An adventurous girl much like Britton. Every since Britton heard about Melaina he has been determined to help in the building of this all accessible playground. He says it's important for "all kids to play together." His heart was touched. Last year he organized a hot cocoa sale at the hospital in his daddy's work lounge. He did it all, I merely assisted. I sat in awe of him while he explained in detail why this playground is so extremely important. He has been after me to help him do something else for Melaina's playground. I kept putting it off, chalking it all up to the busyness of life. A few weeks ago, he looked at me and said, "Momma, we have GOT to do SOMETHING." I knew my procrastination was at it's end. Thanks to a friend, we had discovered some yummy chocolate from Wisconsin. Brit and I discussed and came to the conclusion that these yummy Easter bunnies and lambs would be a fun thing for him to sell. So, on Saturday at the Pre Spring Fling, he sold his bunnies and lambs. Once again, I sat in awe as he grinned his toothless grin from ear to ear and sold people candy to help build a playground. I have no doubt that God laid on his heart to do this. Though his father and I believe it is an amazing cause, his passion is his own. He explains, with confidence, the reason this is important to people with questions. They look to his father and I and seem to think it's our words he is sharing...It is not. Britton has always been his own person. I think back to his toddler years when he showed such compassion at the young age of 2 at the train table at Barnes and Noble. He IS a wonderful example of what Compassion can truly look like.

In watching him on Saturday, I realized that I can learn much from my little seven year old man. He loves without limits. I watched him with Mrs. Cunningham, Melaina's mommy, on Saturday and though he has just met her, he loves her. She is a part of HIS family, HIS circle. He loves freely. No one has to DO anything to earn his love. He just does. And he does so in a VERY mature manner.

He is full of compassion. One Sunday Britton and I were watching Extreme HomeMakeover and there was a story of a little boy who gave his house to another family who did not have one. Britton was amazed by this. I heard him the next day telling his friend about it and how cool it was. I have no doubt that the day is coming when Britton will walk into our home and ask if he can give it or his clothes away. Every year when we pack shoe boxes, he goes to his playroom and gets toys out. He is VERY particular..they must look nice, look new, and be non violent toys. He then puts them in his shoe box to send to other children.

He is fearless. Britton has no idea that the world can be a tough place for a person with a tender heart like his. He has no reservations about telling others they too should give to others. He isn't doing it to be bossy, he just wants everyone to give because HE enjoys it, he says YOU will too!

I remember when I had Britton, I constantly worried that I wouldn't be a good example to him. Little did I know that HE would teach ME.

Brit-boo..I hope you NEVER lose any of this! You are amazing!!

A sweet note..

It is Valentine's Day! Britton is almost 7...I woke him up this morning and then went to the bathroom to get ready. Britton came into the bathroom right after me and said, "Happy Valentine's Day, Momma." I said, "you too Brit," as I turned toward him. There he stood holding out a homemade card he had made just for me. No one told him to...I was so touched. He couldn't have given me anything that would have made me happier...Happy Valentine's Day Britton...I am one lucky Momma!!

A boy after God's own heart....and his Momma's

After I wrote the previous post I was adding the picture of the Family Bible. Britton sat down next to me and was reading the blog. He said, "Momma, that makes me wanna cry." Me, thinking it was because I mentioned him and he was embarrassed, said, "oh, Brit, why?" He said, "because I am just so happy that you are writing it for others to see." Now, I know that David was a man after God's own heart, and maybe it's a momma's bias, but I can't believe that Britton isn't a boy after God's own heart...because he is DEFINITELY his momma's.

A Message in an Unsuspected Place....

This morning our family had to divide. Josh went to church to play in the band and I had to stay home with the boys because Aidan is sick. I had a fairly cruddy attitude when I had to make the decision to stay home. Was really needing a rejuvenation to my spirit this morning. My mind has been plagued by much lately.

A few weeks ago, I had the thought, what if God "makes us" stay here. I thought I was dreaming when I thought He told me we would be moving to Colorado Springs. The love I have discovered for the place is self created, it is my way of running. In essence I was hearing a lot of negative thoughts, making me doubt everything I felt God had told me in our quiet times for the past year. Ironically the job sight for Anesthesiologist has not had ONE job for CO since I started hearing those doubts. See, I thought...You were just being silly. You're not moving. You are where you belong. Just deal! God didn't tell you anything.

Back to present time: As I said previously, I had a really cruddy attitude about having to stay home. I was sitting in the living room, my boys were playing in their bedrooms, and I felt God urge me to get out the Family Reading Bible from Focus on the Family that we bought while in CO. This Bible is amazing. It has three paths to follow that connect characters to each other and lead your family through the Bible. The short path is what we are following because of the ages of our kids, as it is for 3-7 year olds. There are ?'s at the completion of the passage and a "let's talk" section where it provokes thoughts, and makes connections between God, the Bible and your life. I opened it up to where we were last and called the boys down. We piled up on the couch and began reading where we left off last. Now usually I read one passage, ask the ?'s, discuss and then we are done. Today, however, I needed more. My spirit was crying out for more from HIM. I told the boys, let's read some more. Surprisingly, they were excited. We continued to read the next passage about God flooding the Earth and Noah obeying God by building the Ark. I got to the ?'s and the let's talk section. I was sort of mindlessly reading the ?'s and thinking how I could better explain God's plans and actions to my small children. Then God hit me between the eyes. It was so unexpected I actually started and stopped mid sentence. The boys sat patiently & silently looking at me with wide eyes of expectation. They knew something big was happening. Here is what I read: "God showed through his words and through his actions that he remembered his covenant with Noah. God keeps every promise he makes." It was so unsuspected I felt tears immediately well up in my eyes and my spirit soared. It was one of those moments that if I were a little less inhibited I would have jumped up and shouted a hallelujah! You see, the last two weeks I have been listening to the voice of the enemy. He had me convinced that I hadn't really heard God when he guided me to look at CO Springs. Which in turn was tearing apart my confidence in the relationship that I had with my Abba. Not GOOD! I started slipping in my conversations with Him. I began to wonder if I EVER really hear HIM. Or is it voices in my head? Then this morning, without a doubt, God spoke to me. He said, Misty, I hear you..and yes, you heard me. I WILL keep my promise to take you to the city that I showed you. Have faith. You are mine. Even as I write this, I have that urge to shout a hallelujah again! Oh Praise you Lord...You are so good to me and I want to serve you in EVERYTHING I do. I love you.

My boys: as I read God's message to me, Brit's spirit responded to the change in mine. As did Aidans. They both had this big smile on their faces...I didn't immediately share with them the message those words "God keeps every promise he makes" held from my Abba. I needed to think a minute and praise the Lord in private first. But, their spirits knew...they sensed the change in me. Brit said, let's sing some praise songs. So we proceeded to follow our story with a few kids praise songs and then we popped in the new Wow Hits DVD. Brit said Momma, I wanna see the video for Born Again...We all sang along and praised the Lord in dance. Brit said Momma I'm having fun praising God. Thank you for reading two passages this time...I smiled and thought, yes, Thank you God for urging me to do so...Once again, you knew EXACTLY what I needed. Wow, he is so good.

Afterthought: After writing this, I called the boys over to me and shared with them how I had been having these thoughts about not hearing God and such..I would have given anything to have a picture of Britton's wrinkled brow and look of true concern on his face. Then I showed him the part that God used to encourage me. Brit smiled and said, "Momma, God just told you that he promised you we will move to Colorado Springs and he just reminded you that we WILL because he PROMISED." Oh yeah...he gets it...I smiled and said, "Wow isn't God good to us Brit." Brit smiled and said, "Yes, Momma, he is." and the people (me) said...Amen...